EXCLUSIVE: Interview with the Grossbusters

LSC News

First of all, what exactly IS a Grossbuster?

Grossbuster Thomas: Grossbusters are the champions of the human body’s immune system. We fight for truth, justice…..

Grossbuster Lauren: And the hygienic way! There are many forces in the human body that are working hard to make us gross every single day. And it’s our job to stop them.

Of all the professions in the world, what made you want to be a Grossbuster?

Grossbuster Thomas: Well when you’re small enough to fit inside a human nose or stomach, there’s really only one job you were meant to do, and that’s to be a Grossbuster.

Grossbuster Lauren: It’s a huge responsibility we don’t take lightly. When I was young, my town was hit by a flood of sweat. No one was hurt, but nothing ever smelled the same again. I knew then I would do everything I could to make sure that no one else had to go through that.

What sort of training did you need to go through in order to become a Grossbuster?

Grossbuster Lauren: The training is really tough. It’s a pretty select group; there are only about 10 of us. You need to be in good physical shape to stand up to 100 mph sneezes, wade through waist-high ear wax, and climb up and down zits all day.

Grossbuster Thomas: It is also very mentally difficult. Thinking straight when faced with a noxious fart or while getting doused with saliva is not easy. In fact, the training never really stops. We go through drills almost every day to keep us sharp.

What’s your favorite thing about being a Grossbuster?

Grossbuster Lauren: Oh for me it’s the uniform. You can’t help but feel really cool when you strap on that grosspack and utility belt. And when you power it up and those lights turn on, the kids just go crazy for it.

Grossbuster Thomas: And don’t forget the logo, that logo really completes the uniform. For me though, it’s getting to drive the bustermobile. It’s perfectly engineered for quickly getting around the human body.

Grossbuster Lauren: Yeah, you should see how well it handles all those twists and turns in the intestines.

What’s the grossest thing you’ve ever had to face?

Both Grossbusters: Tapeworms!


Grossbuster Thomas: Without a doubt! They have rows and rows of teeth, and some of them can get REALLY big.

Grossbuster Lauren: I’ve seen tapeworms over 50 feet long! It’s a rough day at the office whenever you need to deal with a tapeworm.

How do you defeat a tapeworm?

Grossbuster Lauren: Well fortunately they aren’t too common around here. But to get rid of one…..

(A loud belch interrupts the interview. The ceiling shakes and our interview is cut short.)

Grossbuster Thomas: Uh oh. Sounds like Gaszilla.

Grossbuster Lauren: Twice in one day? He just won’t quit!

Grossbuster Thomas: We better get running, but it was great talking to you. Guess if you want to learn more about tapeworms and other gross things you’ll just need to come visit us.

(A second loud grumble reverberates through the room.)

Grossbuster Lauren: Let’s go bust some gross! To the Bustermobile!


Times: 12:00 pm, 2:00 pm, 3:00 pm
Suitable for all ages.
Seats are limited. Free tickets available at the Jennifer Chalsty Center on a first-come, first-served basis.

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